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鈥淚f we could find a way
To get inside
Each other's mind,
If you could see you
Through my eyes
Instead of your ego
I believe you'd be
Surprised to see
That you've been blind.鈥�
- Joe South

 Joe South wrote a song called, 鈥淲alk a mile in my shoes,鈥� and it was recorded by Elvis Presley in 1970. The point is to consider another person鈥檚 point of view because you can鈥檛 truly understand their experience.

Tony (not his real name) can give you two views regarding gender diversity in the trucking industry. His alter ego, Tina, is a professional driver and owner-operator. I met him at a truck show and was interested in his perspective. He shared his story with me to provide our readers a different view from a 鈥渇emale鈥� driver perspective.  

If you looked at Tony you would think he resembles a middle-aged computer programmer, which is his former profession. He started driving in 1994, and has been over the road since 1998. He鈥檚 married and has five grown children and is Tony when he鈥檚 not in his truck.

Why would Tony change into Tina when he goes to work? It all started when he decided to conserve fuel and began driving under the speed limit. He started getting harassed from other drivers on the CB. They鈥檇 make comments about the 鈥渙ld man鈥� behind the wheel. He noticed that they didn鈥檛 seem to give female drivers the same scrutiny, so he thought he鈥檇 test his theory and he purchased a wig!

Suddenly, no one said a word about his speed as they believed he was a female driver. If he left the wig on when he went into a truck stop, everyone just assumed he was a hippy with long hair. Tony decided to add to the ruse and started dressing in women鈥檚 clothing because he was aware of the disrespectful stares he received when people saw him as a hippie. This didn鈥檛 really change things much, so he figured he needed to look more the part of Tina, so he took it further and wore long sleeves and high neck lines, until he decided to shave his body hair and added shape wear and prosthetics to be more realistic.  

By this time, Tina was his persona when he was in the truck and making deliveries.  Tina was treated differently than Tony, and most everyone seemed more helpful and were overall nicer to her. Tony explains this by saying folks are just more polite and tolerant of questions Tina had to ask. They are also much more likely to strike up a conversation with Tina than they were with Tony. Some people wondered if Tina was transgender, but others accepted her explanation that she had taken hormones for a while, which made her voice lower and face more masculine. 

When asked for an ID at shippers or for law enforcement, Tina shows Tony鈥檚 CDL and explains the temporary gender change. When on the job and is not being asked for an ID, she is sometimes asked about her gender but always insists she is a woman.  Tony admitted, 鈥淢y objective is to pass as a cisgender* female.鈥� Tina says that near as she can tell, the appearance and persona projected is complete and other than her two 鈥榯ells,鈥� she is accepted as female. Spending extra time on her appearance and voice complete the picture.

When asked about the response from Tony鈥檚 family, he said his wife (who is aware of Tina) is married to Tony and Tina only appears when he leaves home and enters the truck. In fact, many of her customers have never met Tony and just accept Tina as she makes her deliveries. 鈥淚鈥檓 in an occupation where once I get in the truck and leave the yard, no one knows who I am,鈥� he said. 

In Tony鈥檚 experience, he feels, 鈥渢here is a definitive half step nicer,鈥� when it comes to how female drivers are treated. 鈥淎s women, you don鈥檛 see this,鈥� he added. 鈥淚 can鈥檛 define it, but it鈥檚 a different level of respect.鈥� He feels that because women have been treated this way for most of their lives, they don鈥檛 see this as 鈥榖etter鈥� but just 鈥榥ormal鈥�.鈥� He also believes that the fact that female drivers are still in the minority could be part of the reason for the difference in treatment towards women in this industry.  

Tony has no plans to physically change his gender and he is happily married to his wife of nearly thirty years. His children are aware of his work transformation. One of his sons is in the process of changing from a male to female as transgender, and Tony is supportive of the decision.

When asked about the future, Tony said he will continue to be Tina until he retires.  He lives by the adage to 鈥淏e Nice.鈥� Although, from his perspective he feels that women are 鈥渆xpected,鈥� to be nicer, he has always lived by that motto, and it鈥檚 served him well as a professional driver.

Joe South was right when he wrote, 鈥淚 believe you鈥檇 be surprised to see that you鈥檝e been blind.鈥� None of us can truly understand another person鈥檚 perspective until we鈥檝e walked a mile in their shoes. Tina鈥檚 shoes are different than Tony鈥檚, and her insight into how female drivers are received in this industry is her own, but one worth sharing.

*cisgender is a person whose gender identity corresponds with the sex registered for them at birth

Written by Ellen Voie, Founder of the 午夜视频.

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